9003 Chapter 3 of: “Twinergy and the boys of Clear Lake!”

I grabbed my skateboard and made for the big pine tree in the middle of the school grounds, to meet Cody. As I made my way there, the rain from the thunderstorm had just begun to let up.

Now, if you’ve never been to the mountains in the summer, with a lake and pine trees during a thunderstorm. Then its a piece of life that you’re missing, and it cannot be explained to do it justice. Because of the humid feel and smells involved, its something you must experience first hand. But it is truly something to behold. As a kid I recognize that, so I stopped for a moment to breath it all in.

I’m one of those kids that has a special awareness unlike the average teen, that just barges through special moments. It’s a softer side that some kids and teens who are emotionally tuned in, and a little overly sensitive, can comprehend. To others who don’t take the time to marvel and appreciate what’s happening around them, they’ll miss out on a lot of the good things life and the world present for the taking. If only they would just open their eyes and look.

The water evaporates on the warm asphalt, and kinda causes a ground fog so to speak. And the rain washes the dust off the pines. Between the rain, the warm asphalt, and the pine trees, it all comes together and attacks your senses through a rush of aroma’s and warm wet air. Throw in the sound of the thunder and the sight of lightning strikes, and it combines for a very emotional aura. Unless of course your one of the unlucky few to be STRUCK by a wayward Bolt. Then I guess the experience becomes a little less appreciated of course.

I felt the heat on my face from the sun, reappearing from behind some puffy thunderclouds. And I turned the corner of the gymnasium to the front of the school, There was Cody in a pair of his red silky running shorts and a tank top. I stopped on a dime and just stared. He hadn’t spotted me yet, but I was dumbstruck. There were those stupid awkward feelings I had again, that I didn’t ask for or understand. His skin was wet and slick and the sun began to shine off his limbs, and reflect off the little hairs on his arms and legs. I had a funny feeling in my stomach, and something weird happened in my shorts as well. Not to mention my face which became hot and red.

Whatever was happening to me was not explained to me by my dad, mom, the school, or anyone else for that matter. I realized I was stiff. And it was stuck between my leg and my boxers, sticking straight out. I panicked and looked around real fast, but no one was close so I relaxed just a bit.

When I turned back, Cody had already spotted me and was smiling that big dumb Cody smile. What the Fuck was going ON? Was I on drugs? And if not, should I be? As I looked up from Cody’s face, a rainbow appeared directly behind him. Then a warm gust of air blew on me from his direction. It must have carried his smell, cause I got a nose full of his shampoo (green apple) and deodorant, and when I breathed in, that was it. That was all I remember except fade to black….THUD!

Next thing I remember I was opening my eyes and everything was kinda fuzzy. I was focusing in and out, and things started to clear up. It was Cody looking down at me holding up some fingers, with McFlanders, our schools Scottish Janitor. I could hear them both asking, “Are you OK?”

I said, “No thanks I already had one?”

They both looked at each other and said, “We better carry him over and lean him against the tree.”

I have no idea what I said or why, but one of the only kids still left there at school ran and got the nurse, Mrs. Manchek. I was clearing up at that point and the three of them almost simultaneously asked what happened. I explained I was walking to meet Cody, and everything slowly went to black. Mrs. Manchek asked if I had been sick and I replied no. She asked if I had eaten anything bad, and I said no, I hadn’t eaten anything at all. Not since breakfast except a couple of energy drinks….. Monsters. Cody looked strange and scratched his head kinda puzzled. She said, “Ahhh, he hasn’t had any nourishment, and he’s dehydrated from too much caffeine.”

Now truth be told, I had eaten lunch, and I hate energy drinks. Probably explaining Cody’s weird reaction, seeing as he knows me better than I know myself. But I had to give myself an “out” since I couldn’t tell the truth and explain that everything was fine. And that I just had a revelation that I might be gay and in love with my best friend. But at any rate, she took the bait and sent the kid to her office for several bottles of water and some trail mix. Of course, Cody produced his own water bottle and a protein bar from his backpack (well, one of my backpacks seeing as he borrowed it the middle of last year, and never returned it. But, I still have some of his clothes……so touche).

I drank the water as if I was really thirsty to dupe Mrs. Manchek, but declined the protein bar saying they make me fart and give me the shits. And with that Cody and McFlanders began to laugh hysterically seeing that I was still a little dazed. All the while Mrs. Mancheck continued picking grass and pine needles out of my bushy hair. But the nurse being the nurse insisted I eat it anyway, which I did.

Of course after Cody’s water and 2 of the 3 bottles the kid brought back from the nurses office, I was sufficiently re-hydrated in her eyes. And waterlogged as if I went down with the Titanic in mine. But I declined a ride home since I was feeling much better and was actually capable of accurately stating how many fingers they were holding up. So Mrs. Manchek let me walk home under Cody’s supervision, telling him to keep a close eye on me, and for me not to take my eyes off of him (of course ironically speaking, she was unaware that was how this all occurred in the first place). We left the school ground, but not before she took my home phone number so she could call my parents. As she was obligated to do, and discuss my poor eating habits.

Now everyone is aware of the out of the frying pan into the fire analogy. So before Mrs. Manchek even agreed to release me to Cody’s supervision for the walk home, I realized there was going to be some awkward questions that I had no idea how to answer. Like for instance why I stared at him for so long while fully boned up with a big stupid smile on my face. At first I thought I might throw him off by deception. Saying that it was because I realized he is more attractive to me than any girl on the planet, and I just wanna be his bitch! Augghhhh, wait a second, if I think real hard, I could probably come up with something better than that…..duhhhh!

Well, he knew I had lunch, cause I ate with him…. tuna on sourdough toast with onion rings and chocolate milk (one of my weaknesses). And that I don’t drink energy drinks, cause I’m hyper anyway. If I just take a sip of his coke or Pepsi, I wont shut up for two whole periods. So it’s milk, chocolate milk, juice, or water.

Well, we began to walk home and I acted tired and sore to buy some time. And he was fine with that but knew I was stalling and that something was up.

He’s gonna want an explanation, so I better come up with something. I thought, well, he knows that I was friends with Rocco Bataglia a few years ago in like 3rd grade. The son of an Italian family that owns a plumbing business in town (and who also happens to be the school doper and drug doofus). So he saw me saying hi to him today after lunch…. he actually said hi to me, but wtf. So I could say I took something he gave me to pep me up since I didn’t sleep well last night, and this was the result.

Well maybe it was a way out, but there were several unattractive after effects. One, there was no telling what Cody would do or say to Rocco (or have our posse’s ENFORCER Blake do to Rocco).

Two was Cody would be pretty upset and disappointed in me, (we did have beers with our older sisters sometimes, but drugs? Nuh-uhhh, no way). And last was I’d be lying to my best friend for the first time in my life. So I didn’t know what I was going to say, and began to fidget and sweat.

About ten or fifteen minutes later, most of the way home, Cody spoke. “Do you wanna talk about it, cause you look like you don’t, you’re kinda a mess. So if you don’t, I understand and I don’t wanna pressure you. We’ve never kept secrets, so I know you’ll tell me when your ready. But just so you know, there’s nothing you’re gonna be able to tell me that can be that bad. And fer sure nothing that’s gonna break up the Twinners! We’re kinda way overdue for one of our talks anyway, and I’ve got some issues to go over with you too.”

So he gave me the out that I deep down kinda figured he would. And I wasn’t afraid of rejection on a large scale, cause we’d talked about other guys who were “like that” and it really wasn’t a big deal to either of us. He wouldn’t hate me if I told him straight (haha) out what was up, we’d still be best friends. But what I feared after the, “Dork, you know I love you and don’t care about that.” Was the, “BUT, it’s not how I am and I don’t feel the same way about you,” part! So I knew the time was coming to come clean, but I also knew I needed a little more time to come up with a way to present it to him in the best light.

So I said, “Cody, I have a lot on my mind right now, and you’re right, no secrets. But the thing is, I just can’t think right now, and I’m really beat. So please just get me home and up to my room so I can nap for a couple hours. And we’re hooking up for the BBQ tonight anyway, so that’s the right time and right place to have this conversation, OK? It’ll be just like we do every year after everyone leaves, and its just you and me.”

Cody: “You sure?”

“Yah, besides, Tasha, (that’s my big tittyed 16-yr-old sister who most of my friends fantasize over) and her friends will be sucking down beer like always. So she usually takes care of us if were cool. And if not, we’re the best little thieves in Clear Lake.” (Our shoplifting skills have been finely honed over the years and had become the thing of legend. We once got an entire watermelon past the checker at our local grocery store). “So either they put out or we use our stealth-like skills to acquire what we need when they’re not looking.”

Cody: “Ok Nika, we’ll just wait till it gets late and things die down. Then when we go up to your room to krash, we can polish off the beer and talk, just like behind the boathouse last time.”

Nika: “Alright Cody, but if its OK with you, lets krash in the tree house over the pool tonight. It’s a full moon, and should give us some sick moonlight, and we won’t have Sasha (my little brother) and his friend in the next room playing video games and screaming all night. Not to mention banging on my door.”

Well, the rest of the way home went like a flash, now that I wasn’t in the line of fire. We made our way down Elm Street (weird name for a street where there’s nothing but pine trees? But whatever). And we ran into Travis and Wesley, one of our best friends (Blake) younger twin brothers (Blake is one of the 6 founding members of our posse….and the Enforcer). Travis and Wesley make my out-of-control little brother Sasha look like a choir boy.

They were in shorts and that’s it. Covered from head to toe in mud, playing with a football on their front lawn, taking full advantage of the Thunderstorms. I believe the goal of the game they were playing was to pound whichever one of them had the football at the time into the ground/mud. Take the football, and then in turn get pounded into the ground/mud (smear the twin I guess). They were too preoccupied to see us as we were passing by, and we were laughing at them pretty hard. As they are not only hella cute (opps, don’t say that out loud dammit), but hella funny as well. If they aren’t a tag team in the WWE in 10 years, then I’ll be amazed.

Even Blake gives them their space, and he is the biggest and badest of all six of us. He can school them both if need be, but not without insult and injury to his own body. And with them getting bigger every day, you can see his strategy is to get closer with them. Because where they will never be able to take Blake one-on-one, his days of taking both of them on at once are trickling down to a precious few, and he knows it.

They are also best friends with my brother Sasha, and I was surprised he wasn’t out there with them as his favorite things seem to be mud and bugs. With all the weird thoughts I had lately, it wasn’t all that surprising to me that I couldn’t take my eyes off them as I walked by. They were my size, as they were big for just turned 12-yr-olds, and look identical to Remy Thorne. We’ve swam with them naked in our pool and occasionally at the lake, and just like Blake, they are HUNG. And they aren’t shy about it.

Well, as we passed by unnoticed, Cody began to blurt something out, and I slapped my hand over his mouth as fast as I could. Giving him by best, SHUSSSSSSHHHH, ARE YOU KRAZY, look. Then I whispered,  “If you shake a tree, a leopard’s gonna fall out!” (My version of its best to let sleeping dogs lay)! But it was too late, we were spotted.

They looked at us and said, “Travis don’t they look awfully clean to you?”

“Yah Wesley, too clean in fact!”

I heard Cody gulp, and turn to look at me saying “Oppppsssss!”

Then like a couple of raptors from Jurassic Park, came two krazed, muddy, hyperactive, Psycho’s making their way towards us like a corner blitz on an unsuspecting quarterback.

Right before the point of impact, were Cody and I wide-eyed and clinging to one another like Scooby and Shaggy when the monster appears in Scooby Doo. But just then we heard an ear piercing whistle from somewhere behind them and the two of them veered left and right of us kinda like the comet did when it missed the earth in the movie Armageddon.

Cody: “Phewwww, that was close!”

We looked up, and saw Blake coming out of the house eating a drumstick (and no, not the ice cream, and not a chicken leg either). It was a turkey leg I think, cause they don’t sell Ostrich legs in Clear Lake…at least as I have seen, but it was big.

I was never more glad to see him in my life (cept maybe the time he came to Cody’s with a porno dvd he swiped from his dad, but that’s another story).

Nika: “What the fuck are you eating Blake”?

Cody blurted out, “And what’s that white shit all over it?”

Blake: “Its a turkey leg, and I dipped it in mayo.”

Blake was never shy about his appetite, and being the elder of the 6-pak (our posse) at 14, almost 6 foot and about 175 lbs, it showed.

Blake: “Wat-up, fools? And what are you doing?”

The twins had turned around by now after slowing down from there charge, and we all met in the middle of the street.

“Hey, thanks for the save Blake,” I said.

Cody mumbled, “We’re heading back to Nika’s house.”

Then he piped in “Yah, and Nika got sick and passed out at school, so we appreciate you calling off the hounds.”

Wesley: “Wow Nika, you really got sick and passed out, did you puke?”

Nika: “NO, I didn’t puke, and shut up Cody, I just kinda fainted is all.”

Blake: “Ha ha, wat a wuss dude! You need to eat more man, here you wanna bite?”

Nika: “NO, YUK, get that thing circumcised and outta my face Blake, that’s nasty!”

The twins chuckled, and one of them said, “You just missed your brother, he went home to clean up before the BBQ. As a matter of fact, your mom wouldn’t let him in the house and you’re sister was making him strip buck naked and spraying him off with the garden hose in the front yard.”

Blake: “Yah, something your both gonna be doing as soon as I’m done eating this.”

Nika: “Hey, you guys are all coming tonight….right?”

The twins simultaneously: “Hell yah, gotta check out your sisters tits in her thong.”

And Blake: “Well it is a BBQ and they’ll be hella food everywhere….rite?”

Nika: “Yah to both of you guys, and is your mom and dad gonna stop by for a while?”

Blake: “Yah, they’ll come by for a couple of drinks with the rest of the parents, and they made a turkey and potato salad, it is an annual pot luck BBQ…Duhhhhh!”

Cody: “Ahhh, so that’s where the turkey leg came from, huh?”

Blake: “Yah, I just had to check and make sure it was done.”

About that time we all froze as we heard a bone chilling, shrill scream come from the kitchen side door, “BLAKEEEE, What The Hell did you do to my bird?”

So at that point, Blake said, “See you guys in a couple hours, I’m gonna take a walk around the block till mom kools down….and you two idiots, don’t even think about going in the house till I get back and spray you guys off.”

Nika: “Kool, see you guys tonight then.”

5 Responses to “9003 Chapter 3 of: “Twinergy and the boys of Clear Lake!””

  1. Stef Says:

    Keeps getting better – cracked up laughing. Realy enjoy your sense of humour.
    Also really relate to the sence of smell – I know some of my friends smell really nice and just the cent stirs the emmotions. Living in the country is also a feast for the cent senses – the after the rain smell, new mown hay, clean stables with fresh straw boxes ETC.
    I’d better stop writting and keep reading.
    Kindest regards stef.

    • codyboarder Says:

      haha, yah, i can totally relate stef. i love smell and how it conjurs up memories. my 3 favs are pine trees, lemons, and rain. of course coffe grounds are awesome too (even though i really dislike coffee).

  2. Steve Says:

    the part about thetwns “game” that they were playing in the mud brought back tons of memories. In my scout troop we used to play a similr, but less violent version of the same game. We called it smeer-the-queer (no pun orany other form of word play/joking intended) good times

  3. Uncle Says:

    Not only can I relate, but the humor in questioning your sexuality and the inability to say what was on your mind – especially as disconcerting as your feelings about your best friend faced with what this invested love might be lose – was perfect! lol. Gosh, I remember those days and the feeling. Great work!

  4. Chrizzledawg Says:


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